Zannen's Story Bin o'Stuff!
by Zannen
Summary: Every author needs a story bin that's full of half-baked ideas and one-shots that she writes to get rid of a nagging idea for a story she knows will go nowhere. This one's mine.
1. Waiting

She didn't fall in love with him right away or even in slow increments as some people say. She didn't wake up one morning believing that he was her light and laughter. Nor did time stop during a routine mission as she glanced over at him and saw him for who he was…loved him for everything he represented.

No. None of these things happened to her. Contrary to popular belief, Ino didn't change her mind once Chouji saved her once again from an enemy attack or told her that she needed to eat more as he piled more BBQ onto her plate.

Yamanaka Ino was born loving Akimichi Chouji.

She was simply waiting for his confidence to catch up to his heart.

Because even a supposed airhead like her knew that the loveable shinobi who gave the best hugs ever would never accept her love without accepting himself first.

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**A/N:**

Okay, so every author needs a story bin that's full of half-baked ideas and one-shots that she writes to get rid of a nagging idea for a story she _knows_ will go nowhere. This one's mine. Some will be drabbles like this chapter, some may be longer. This will be updated sporadically...beware.

Ja ne!

~Zannen


	2. Revulsion

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto.

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Ino saw a lot of hideous things as a shinobi. In truth, the kunoichi saw more than her share of horrid, putrid, and downright _nasty_ things given that she possessed a jutsu that enabled her psyche carte blanche into the minds of pretty much everyone she came across. She was the daughter of Yamanaka Inoichi and the secret apprentice to not only Morino Ibiki, but Mitarashi Anko as well. She was being slowly groomed to take up the Torture and Interrogation Unit just as Shikamaru was to take over the Tactical Unit of Konoha's ANBU. She saw things that would have turned her hair white if it wasn't already close to platinum blonde.

So to say that the sight before her turned her insides into a twisting mass of revulsion and almost caused the return appearance of her lunch was no small matter.

As her enemies and allies noticed the horror and disgust on her beautiful face, Ino could barely make out the contempt filled words shouted to her from across the battlefield.

"Oi!" the purple-eyed man yelled, casually laying his tri-bladed red scythe across his shoulders. "Does my partner's true form look _that_ bad?"

The wriggling mass of threads, flesh, and clothing next to him let out a rusty laugh. Kakuzu was used to seeing women's eyes widen in terror at the sight of his sutured skin and green on red eyes. But the look on the blonde kunoichi's face trumped all glares before her.

"It's gross," Ino shouted back, drawing her hand down from her mouth. She pointed a manicured finger at Kakuzu's form. "It's disgusting and wrong! How can you look and live like that and call yourself a human being?!"

"They're just stitches in skin, little girl," Hidan grinned.

"Sutures are nothing!" Ino agreed. "I'm a medical shinobi! I've seen worse."

The girl's admission puzzled everyone in the clearing—with the exception of Shikamaru, who almost slammed his palm to his face when he realized what his life-long friend and teammate was talking about.

Unable to take the suspense any longer, Hidan growled his question. "The why the fuck do you have that look on your face like a dog just shat in your underwear drawer and then dragged it's ass over your bed?"

"I can't HELP IT!" Ino yelled, waving her arms around. "He's….he's…"

"I'm what, kunoichi?" Kakuzu asked, impatient to hear the answer.

"**HE'S WEARING A HALTER TOP!!!"**

Shikamaru's hand slapped against his forehead.

Kakashi blinked and rubbed his eyes.

Chouji frowned and looked again at their thread-covered opponent.

Hidan turned to his partner and began laughing uncontrollably.

And Kakuzu…

Well…

He had a heart attack.

And that's how Kakuzu lost his second heart in that fateful battle.

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**A/N:**

Crack. I know. But I was re-watching that battle and I suddenly realized it. Kakuzu is wearing a man version of a halter-top. If someone else noticed and wrote about it, I'm sorry. But the idea got stuck in my head and I absolutely _had _to write about it.

~Zannen


End file.
